Monday 6 August 2012

Not my post!

This time, we bring you a post written by Kirti Veluri, a friend, prolific writer and fellow member of Footloose No More! All I can say is, "I AGREE!"
 
Kirti says, 
 
The eternal question that has remained unanswered for ages! What are we looking for a in a man. If he has the looks, we go for the wealth. If money is what he possesses, we want someone who would really “understand” us. If the macho man is hitting on us, we want the metro-sexual. Which brings me back to my previous question – What do we really want? Are we always chasing something that is unattainable? Or is it just the exhilaration of the chase that makes us go for someone who just can’t be yours! 

To make matters worse, just when we (when I say “we”, I am referring to all the single 30+ women) kinda get used to the idea of being happily single ever after, the world around us seems to move in couples. You end up seeing couples everywhere…at parties, at the movies, at clubs, in the park….dogs too stroll around in couples. Its like nature is on a mission to mock you! To challenge you to be “single”. And so the rat race to find the “perfect” man begins again. My friends always tell me to play “hard to get” because that’s what keeps the man intrigued. I never used to believe in it so much till I actually started seeing it work in front of my eyes. Keeping it mysterious, quite evidently, is the right thing to do. I remember, as a young girl, I was always fascinated by something which I couldn't have. The unachievable was always very enticing! Does this theory apply to all of us even when we grow up? 

I, for one, have always attracted men who are commitment phobic. I was told that the reason this syndrome is so common with me is because subconsciously I too am commitment phobic. To cover my flaws, I look for someone who has them and then blame it on him. It got me thinking – is it true that I too suffer from this phobia? Is it true that we look for excuses to camouflage what we lack in ourselves? I hope as hell that that is not the case. Because I am a die hard romantic who still believes in fairy tales and happily ever afters. Sure I get cynical at times…but I’d blame it on the “Couple” attack :-). Who do you blame it on?

8 comments:

  1. Women as well as men are commitmentphobic...it comes from our fears of getting hurt again, giving up on singledom among other things.
    There indeed is utter confusion about what we want...it is easier to focus on who we are. Once that is sorted, what we want becomes clearer.
    Always good to remember, the wrong face on the pillow next to yours can lead to all types of madness...its true and terribly sad.
    The up side is...you have a choice to get the rightt face lying on the pillow next to yours.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. :-) A good point of view there sandy, both men and women are more often that not scared of commitment cos they are scared of getting hurt...Kirti

      Delete
  2. isin't this an old post Varsha, remember reading it before...am i wrong?

    ReplyDelete
  3. I was this terribly romantic girl believing in M&Bs' where this tall, not necessarily dark, handsome guy would sweep me off my feet ! I love to be wooed with chocolates, wine and flowers.
    But I have over the years seen and learnt that very few men now want to waste precious time on these silly things any more, i may be wrong.
    It is the age of instant gratification and yes I have learnt from experience that it is always better to play unavailable. It goes beyond all that i stand for and I feel like a fake doll but then the chase is always more exciting and thrilling then the kill...that's what they say.At the end of it all I am looking for someone who will be with me in sickness and in health, in good times and bad times.I look for companionship all the time, my soul mate ? i will never know....'

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

      Delete
    2. Thanks for your inputs Monica....i agree with you; it is the age of instant gratification...sigh. Kirti

      Delete
  4. Pankaj! This one is written by Keerti Veluri for Footloose No More!

    ReplyDelete