Monday 3 September 2012

The Dating Rules

After that last event of Footloose No More, a gentleman called me. He had met a nice girl and wanted to know when it would be appropriate to call her and ask her out. I said I had no idea and he was surprise. "But what about the dating rules?" he sputtered! Again, I had no idea! Are there dating rules? I don't know!

In my own relationship, we did whatever came naturally to us. We were texting each other within a few hours of meeting and never stopped. We met on day 3, were seeing each other within a week and married a few months later. If we had ignored instincts and followed dating rules, we may have lost interest and would still be walking around each other in circles wondering when it was appropriate to confess our feelings and got married by the age of 95! On the other hand, being in touch so soon, may have put one of us off.

This is a dilemma that will stay with us forever. If we call too soon, we are desperate or trying too hard. If we don't we didn't try enough. So what does one do? Wait for the standard 3 days after meeting someone to call? Wait another 3 before asking them out? It's a classic case of damned if you do and damned if you don't.

On the other hand, the relationships I see working out are those where things have happened almost instantly. The people concerned felt a connect, a pull or whatchamaycallit, reacted and decided to explore without being afraid of exploring...or being rejected.

I guess my point is simple, "nothing ventured, nothing gained." Give it a try, if the other person doesn't react, move on! As for dating rules...I've been a rule breaker all my life! I'd hardly begin to figure them out now. The only rules I follow come from my gut!

So here's my dating rule number 1 - There are no rules!

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