Wednesday, 15 May 2013


When I was single (aka not even a whiff of single men, in fact facing an absolute famine), I used to tell all my friends, enemies and what have you, "Introduce me to single men! I've decided to outsource my love life to you!" One of my close friends even dealt with cries of, "Come on Sandhya! You can do it!!!" But the truth is that they knew only so many single people and my so called love life was a total disaster! Add to this the fact that I wanted to be married, and I had a disaster on my hands. And then, one day it dawned on me. I could not outsource something as important as the rest of my life!

I don't even let someone else prepare a presentation, or shoot a film, I don't outsource the buying of my shoes or clothes, I do not have a personal shopper - so how could I let someone decide who I was going to love for ever?

And that gyan, learned in my great fun single days is what I'd like to share. If we were to actually rely on someone, would we all not just have arranged marriages? Because after all, who knows us better than them? Who better to figure out which man/woman we will get along with? Besides, somethings, like going to the gym and choosing our better or bitter half, cannot be outsourced.

Our friends may know us well enough, but here's a story! My brother Abhishek and his wife Dali have a close common friend. And yet, she never introduced them, thinking they were not "each other's type." They met on Footloose No More and are happily married now!

If it were so easy to marry someone another person chose for us, based on a list of qualities, there would be no inter religion marriages, or younger men marrying older women, or irate parents trying to stop their children from marrying those they think unsuitable.

And before you wonder what is the point of this, land up at every place you may meet single people (including the ones women's magazines tell you about), be yourself, don't wait for an introduction and take a leap of faith, because, and I speak from experience (everyone thought my husband and I were a total mismatch) - even we ourselves don't know who we want to grow old with until we meet that special person who makes our heart go "pitter patter."

So go ahead, outsource your wedding, but the marriage - keep that in your own hands and heart! And if you outsource you marriage to me, I want to go on the dates too!