Saturday 22 September 2012

I will love you to the end of the world!

I will love you to the end of the world! That's a promise everyone makes - to a lover, parents, siblings, kids and friends! And yet, relationships are a clear case of, "Today's friends will be enemies tomorrow."

Each one of us has these. Look back and count how many people we were close to, whom we no longer can stand sight of! There are bitter fights, divorces and being disowned. And then we meet in public, we look away and a casual onlooker will never know that these two people swore by each other once!

Why do we hurt the ones most? Because we can! We know exactly which buttons to push, what to say and what to do. We know exactly where to hit so they are destroyed and we can't resist using the information in a fit of anger or pre meditated plans.

But why do we do it? Here are people who have stood by us, and now the only they can give us joy is by being gone!

I do agree that sometimes situations are impossible and these people must be let go of. But being a great believer of relationships, my heart says, "NO."

I will beg, grovel, yell and scream but try and keep the people who once made me happy. And i find it's pretty simple.

Sometimes we argue that the other person is making our lives hell...and they well might be. But i've found that at times all it takes ro keep someone is to ask "what happened? Is everything ok?" Chances are, we will find it's not. Work pressures, elusive success, financial worries or any number of reasons may be the cause. We may be the cause too, however unwittingly. Jibes guised as humour, gentle insults which could hurt even if they seem funny, expecting them to always be around, not being open to accepting that we may have done something! All of these and more comtribute.

But fact is, a little gentle probing, accepting that we too may have contributed to the hurt, or even a simple hug may help. I find that when I am really upset with someone, their refusal to go away and a hug helps!

So the next time we decide to pack off someone because they are being painful, let us just try to ask, accept and give them a hug. Because some relationships are forever. Even if we end them, they will stay and at every step we will wish we were still speaking because some things can only be shared with the one we went away. Presence is infinitely better than memories. Trust me :)

And watch those words. It is definitely possible to hurt people irrevocably. And people break. Destroying someone we once loved is not worth the time we will have with ourselves once they are gone. Go out and make that call and see what happens. It's just a call after all!

5 comments:

  1. It takes days, months and years to build on a relationship.How much we invest our time and emotions but at the drop of a hat we sulk, pout and yes turn bitter enemies with the people we once were so thick pals with.I believe we should always keep a relationship such that in the end we can look the person in the eye and most importantly, ourselves. Time is a great healer and I know it helps overcome the worst of pain. It is so wonderful when you can forgive someone who has wronged you in some way. yes I agree it is always two people who make and break a relationship.Revenge and bitterness and negativity only makes you miserable in the end.yes at times it is best to let go but not of the good times you shared with someone.if we can be best friends Forever, in spite of it all I think we have lived our lives !

    ReplyDelete
  2. Relationships are like books on your shelf. Some dusted, some gathering dust, some tattered and worn and yet a precious part of your life...
    I love this post Varsha. I think this is one endless strugggle in our heads. I falter so many times. I make up too...but there are heart-breaking ones that haven't been re-visited.
    And yes...a hug works.
    Now, I question myself when I have a fight...what's more important? The fight or the person. Invariably, the person wins. :) And yes, I have you to thank for this as well.
    Big hugs!

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