Friday, 5 October 2012

Always wear sunscreen!

It is widely believed that men prefer bitches! Books have been written on this subject, friends give this advice to each other and the idea has generally gained momentum in the past decade or so! And I must say, I agree!!!

But let's define bitch according to this theory! A bitch is someone who doesn't give a damn...who keeps the man dangling, giving him the impression that she's going to walk away at any moment without a backward glance...she's busy, successful and self sufficient and does not need a man to make her happy. She is complete within herself and you, my dear man, man go into your corner and think about this!

Now here's the truth. In my many years on this planet, I haven't ever met such a woman...leave alone be one! Women care, we are vulnerable, we do not walk away, we fight, we scream, we cling on and we hurt when you take off. We are complete within ourselves, but we like you and your little attentions make us happy!

I have in fact, seen men go for the type of woman often called the bitch. Whenever I've asked, the answer has been, "I don't need to worry about her. She's capable of taking care of herself." My question to the men is, "you want to go out with a woman who seems strong so that dumping her will cause no scenes?" Really? Then why waste your time and ours when your exit strategy is in place? You're not even honestly giving it a try because in my experience, the people we stay with do cling, they do need us, they love us too much and smother us in their affection. And oh yes! There are scenes!

And not for a moment must we believe that all will be calm. There will be scenes...inside her head, with her friends, and lots of tears. Just because she appears strong doesn't mean she won't fall apart. Just not in front of you! If she sees you post dumping, smiles and walks away, she's just decided that you don't deserve to see her womanly side...

No matter how strong a woman is, she does bleed when she is hurt, as my dear men, do you! How many men have I lent my shoulder to post their break ups? MANY! How many have been hurt? Each one of them!

So perhaps we should stop looking for the bitch or the tough guy! They don't exist (unless they're creeps, and in my opinion, few of us are). Let us accept that things will work out or not, but to expect someone not to be hurt is too much to ask, so let's just treat each other with respect! Having said that, protect yourself...and always wear sunscreen :)


  1. Oh gosh!!! You said it. Love this post. I hope the men and women are reading this and absorbing it!

  2. so true...varsha i will say that the men who prefer bitches Should GET THEM...and they should remain miserabley together without screwing up the lives of smart soft and sensitive people. i cannot ever cry in front of most ppl and seem mostly carefree casual but sob i do in my private spaces when hurt...