Tuesday, 2 October 2012

Then we got married, and everything changed!

I'm just back from Goa, where I was celebrating my 1st wedding anniversary :) While having breakfast in the hotel, we met this couple with a child. They'd been married 7 years and were pulling our leg. And when I told them I couldn't wait to be married long enough to be bored, they were surprised! "Why?" she said. "Everything will change." "I know! Everything changed after we got married too." I said.

And that's a fact. It did. Exactly like everyone had warned me! Before we got married, everything was exciting, I looked at everything with wonder, received many calls and a message every 5 minutes. I knew he was thinking of me! I couldn't wait to see him! He couldn't wait either. There were flowers, gifts, dinners, movies, running away from work to meet and sneaking away for holidays. He said sweet things to me and I giggled!

All that changed! Now, when I wake up every morning, I look at a man who cared enough to make a commitment! I look at a man who was happy to tell the world how he felt! The many calls and messages have stopped, and been replaced by the knowledge that we will be together...everyday! I don't need them anymore, because I know he's thinking of me...the little smiley as message tells me that! The dinners, movies, flowers and gifts exist, but now they are part of my life! I don't need them on a daily basis, because he gave me the utmost respect a man can give a woman! He no longer needs to prove it on a daily basis!

True, the thrill of a new romance will never enter my life again, true there will never be excitment, true I will never ever go out on a date! But what I will have is the comfort of knowing I will come home to someone everyday, there will always be someone to care for me, there will be someone who will put up with my bad moods and morning face (as long as I don't become a monster, of course) and I will have peace and comfort in my life! He never needs to prove anything to me again with grand gestures, because he already has done that.

Now is the time to move on, to make the commitment back to him! To give as much as I take (and I take a lot)! Now is the time to make it work!

And that is the test of relationships! Can we survive the lack of excitemnet, romance and grand gestures? Can we be happy with quiet love, peaceful evenings, comfort and being taken for granted! Can we give as much as we'd like to receive? I believe it is possible! Unless the person turns out to be Mr. Hyde it is possible! As long as we remember that after Prince charming found Cinderella and married her, they settled down to a normal life...and that's the life I want :)


  1. Very true Varsha .. When we complain about our partners taking us for granted, we tend to forget that, this is exactly what you sign up for in a long term relationship. The comfort of knowing that there is someone to go back home to will also have the inquisitive queries where you have to justify your whereabouts. Yes romance / excitement will come down by notches, but we always have calmness and a comfort zone (where you can be yourself) at the other end. And most of all we have someone who's got our back at any given time !

  2. Big Big Hugs! Commitment is important. I know what you are saying. Have seen it. Cheers to you guys! :)