Sunday, 25 November 2012

Being Carrie Bradshaw!

Somewhere in Sex And The City, Carrie Bradshaw makes a profound statement about the kind of love she wants. It's something I don't remember clearly, largely because I think that's setting yourself up for failure, but also because I have enough love quotes of my own! However, this one goes something like this, "Love should be all consuming, passionate, inconvenient love!" (Feel free to search for the real quote). And this is something I find most of my female friends are looking for! And I want to shake them! Inconvenient, all consuming love? Really? That's what you want? A life time of it? And if you do find it, when will you live comfortably? Happily? Conveniently?

I blame my parents for giving me a completely different idea about love. Theirs is a marriage that has lasted 45 years! It was an arranged match. They met across a table, liked what they saw and got married. I'm sure there were periods of adjustment - my dad has too much energy and everyone has to get swept away and my mom cries when she is hungry. They were chalk and cheese and to repel would have been easy. But they went about the business of being married and along the way found love! From what I see, theirs is not an all consuming, inconvenient love that leaves you gasping. It is simple, undemanding, letting the other person be, and wanting to be together. They hold hands (yes! If you see an old couple holding hands and walking down, it would be safe to assume they are the Agnihotris), and live for each other. And they go about making things convenient and comfortable for each other. And I do believe that is the reason they have lasted so long, not just together, but being in love!

And that, to me is all consuming love! It doesn't leave you breathless! It helps you breathe easy! It doesn't keep you on your toes. It helps you stand firm! It doesn't leave you awake at night! It helps you sleep easy! It is love in it's purest form. It doesn't consume you, it gets consumed by you and makes you go forth!

And perhaps that is what we should look for. Perhaps we should glide into love as opposed to falling head long in to it! Perhaps that is how we will learn to survive in this ocean called love!!!


  1. This is the complete quote:"I am someone who is looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't-live-without-each-other love."
    Oh well well! Love will be what it will be...for some a slide into the real thing and for others a machine gun that suddenly draws your life out of you. Carrie Bradshaw wasn't ready to settle for anything less and heck, she is not a live person, we are human, alive and very real. May we all find that love and may we walk holding hands with the one we love when we get real old...I'd like that. Very much. To make it an all-consuming thing...that is easy...That, my girl, is in our control... :)

  2. Oh and being Carrie Bradshaw also means loving yourself. So she says, "But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous."